


hydrogen in our veins (it cannot hold itself)

by blackkat



Series: Tumblr Drabbles [112]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Flirting, Friendship, Humor, M/M, Single Parents, discussion of child illness, sugar daddy jokes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-03
Updated: 2018-09-03
Packaged: 2019-07-06 12:41:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15886275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackkat/pseuds/blackkat
Summary: “He’s hot, isn't he?” Izuna asks, stealing one of Tobirama’s pens.Entirely distracted by his thoughts, Tobirama grunts in agreement, then realizes exactly what he was confirming and snaps his head up to glare at Izuna. Izuna just laughs in his face, and Tobirama groans and presses a hand over his eyes.





	hydrogen in our veins (it cannot hold itself)

There's a child on his secretary’s back.

Tobirama blinks, not quite able to comprehend what he’s seeing for a moment. It’s very definitely their secretary, who as always looks like he’d be more at home as a bouncer in a bar than sitting behind the desk in a research center. But—Tobirama’s always rather thought him short-tempered and grim and unapproachable, most certainly not the type for _this_. It’s hardly been a bother; Tobirama is generally cold and unapproachable himself. But this change is…surprising.

“Don’t knee me in the kidney,” Zabuza says, and that tone is irritated but there's a thread of humor underneath it, too. “You’re not a monkey, Haku.”

“Don’t put your kidneys under my knee, then,” the child says primly, and with that fall of long hair Tobirama can't tell if they're a boy or a girl. “Is Kisame coming in today?”

Zabuza grunts, leaning over his desk, and Haku scrambles up a little higher on his shoulders. The child can't be more than seven, Tobirama thinks, tapping his fingers against his clipboard. Not precisely the type they normally have wandering around the center. It could be dangerous.

“He’d better be,” Zabuza says, picking up a file and shoving it into the outbox. “He said he could watch you until lunch, but he was supposed to turn up half an hour ago. If he’s not here I'm going to kick his ass.”

That, at least, Tobirama has a response to. He steps forward, out of the elevator, and says, “Doctor Hoshigaki was called away due to a problem with one of the tiger sharks,” he says, and it’s mildly amusing to watch Zabuza twitch and spin, the child’s long hair swinging out as he turns to face Tobirama.

Apprehension flickers across Zabuza’s face, quickly buried as he nods. “Director,” he says, taking a step back.

Tobirama raises a brow at him, then shifts his gaze to the child, who stares back with curious eyes. “Is this a new hire?” he asks dryly.

“Zabuza said when I'm older I can be director if I want,” Haku tells him solemnly, and the way Zabuza’s eyes widen in something like panic is enough to make Tobirama fight back a smirk.

“Of course,” Tobirama tells Haku. “But you’ll have to do well in school first.”

Haku's expression shades towards longsuffering. “Zabuza said that, too.”

“He’s entirely correct,” Tobirama confirms, and then drops his gaze to the secretary. “Momochi, I'm sure you are aware that this facility isn't always the safest?”

“Yeah,” Zabuza says, still faintly wary, and Tobirama tries to recall his resume, but he didn’t conduct the interview—Izuna took care of it, and that’s enough to make Tobirama want to doublecheck Zabuza’s references, or at least his work history. Izuna's decisions can be…questionable. “Sorry, Director, but there's no school today and my babysitter fell through. Kis—Doctor Hoshigaki said he’d let Haku sit in his lab until lunch, though.”

Tobirama inclines his head, accepting that. He remembers all too well how difficult it was for him and Hashirama to take care of Itama and Kawarama after their father died, all the moments of disaster when plans fell through and it felt like the whole world had turned against them. He’s never seen any other sign that Zabuza is a single father, and that already speaks well of the man’s organization.

“Be careful not to get underfoot,” he warns Haku. “Doctor Hoshigaki’s lab is always fascinating, but it can be dangerous as well.”

“I’ll be careful,” Haku promises.

“Good. Momochi, I’ll need the schedule for the upcoming grant renewals copied in triplicate and delivered to my office before ten.”

“Yes, sir.” Zabuza takes a step back, and when Haku slides off his back he puts a hand up to steady him, attention shifting. Tobirama keeps walking, not bothering to call his attention back. Having Zabuza here, even with other things to occupy part of his time, will be more productive than having him take a sick day. And—

It’s interesting. Tobirama glances over his shoulder just before he rounds the corner, finds Zabuza in the middle of throwing Haku over his shoulder, and smiles a little to himself. He wouldn’t have ever thought to peg Zabuza as a father, but it’s clear that’s what he is. A decent one, even, from what Tobirama saw.

Tobirama is always interested in people’s layers, especially when he can't predict them.

 

 

Zabuza’s file is an oddity. He has no family listed except for his son, has held a series of jobs from construction worker to security guard to diver, and has filed three changes of address in the past nine months. Bad luck, Tobirama assumes, or perhaps bad circumstances. Secretary and receptionist for a marine biology research laboratory is hardly the most highly-paid job, and the sheer number of jobs Zabuza has left or been let go from is impressive. Tobirama is a little surprised Izuna hired him, but then, he has a decent face, and Izuna is stupid about pretty people.

There have been no complaints about Zabuza so far, though. Or, well, nothing beyond Madara protesting being made to sign in to visit his brother, which Tobirama hardly has a problem with. He smirks a little, reading the note Madara shoved under his door complaining about the rabidly overzealous receptionist, and then tucks it into the desk drawer it usually occupies as he considers Zabuza. His employment history is a concern, and Tobirama has to wonder if his level of work is going to start deteriorating shortly, given past history.

“Are you brooding about something in here?” Izuna complains, making Tobirama lift his head. The CFO waves a stack of folders at him, looking annoyed, and says, “Budget reports aren’t _that_ bad, come on. We’re actually under budget this quarter.”

“By twenty dollars again?” Tobirama asks dryly, but he flips Zabuza’s employment file closed and reaches for Izuna's stack.

“Twenty dollars is more than enough to buy a couple of boxes of pens, don’t complain,” Izuna says airily. He squints at Tobirama’s desk, shoves his glasses up his nose, and then raises a brow. “Is that Zabuza’s file? Did he make Madara have a temper-tantrum again?”

“If he had I would only be upset if he hadn’t filmed it,” Tobirama tells him, and when Izuna snickers he adds, “I was concerned by his list of previous jobs. They all seem…short-term.”

Izuna makes a sound of understanding. “I was worried about that, too,” he says. “He listed Kisame, Mei, and Utakata as personal references, though, and all three of them vouched for him. Apparently his son had some kind of heart condition that made it hard for him to hold down a job, and now he’s trying to pay off the medical bills.”

That would certainly put his history in a new light, Tobirama thinks, considering the folder for a moment. The boy seemed more adult than most children his age, more subdued, and a serious illness would certainly result in that.

“He’s hot, isn't he?” Izuna asks, stealing one of Tobirama’s pens.

Entirely distracted by his thoughts, Tobirama grunts in agreement, then realizes exactly what he was confirming and snaps his head up to glare at Izuna. Izuna just laughs in his face, and Tobirama groans and presses a hand over his eyes.

“It’s okay,” Izuna tells him consolingly, and pats him on the shoulder. Tobirama _hates_ him. “Everyone with eyes thinks he’s hot. A couple of days ago he stayed late to help unload a shipment and ended up taking his shirt off while he carried boxes. I don’t think I've ever seen that many people walk into walls.”

Tobirama is almost sorry he missed it. “He is…attractive,” he allows, and when Izuna snickers he kicks him in the ankle.

“Also in dire need of a sugar daddy,” Izuna says cheerfully. “I’d go for him, but it might make Orochimaru tetchy.”

“Like he needs more reasons,” Tobirama says dryly, and is quite content to pretend that he and Izuna never waged a covert war to see who could woo the new scientist first. Izuna may have won, but Tobirama will always maintain that Izuna getting locked in a supply closet with Orochimaru was dirty rotten cheating. He’s mostly just mad that he didn’t think of it first.

“Right? He’s so cute when he’s jealous.” Izuna taps Tobirama on the head with the last file, then pulls himself up to sit on the edge of the desk. “So, are you going to go for it? Save the handsome, beleaguered secretary from overworking himself at a young age? Provide for his hopes and dreams in return for getting all of that gorgeous muscle in your bed?”

“If I was, I certainly wouldn’t tell _you_ ,” Tobirama informs him, then steals the pen from his hand and crosses out a word on the first page. “This is _not_ how you spell ‘invertebrate’. Did you even attend college?”

“Yeah, for _math_ ,” Izuna retorts, and quickly flips to the next page. “ _Okay_ , moving on, scientists are complete shit at budgeting. In other news the sky is blue and I know some really great places to take a hot single father on the perfect date so you can get into his pants right off the bat.”

Tobirama throws a paperweight at him and feels no regret, even when their meeting ends up devolving into a wrestling match on the floor of his office.

He wins, of course.

 

 

Tobirama is fairly certain the left half of the glass door is going to have a face imprint on it if this keeps happening.

“See?” Izuna says, amused, from where he’s leaning against the balcony railing next to Tobirama. “ _Hot_.”

“Everyone else certainly thinks so,” Tobirama says, but he can't quite pull his gaze away from Zabuza either. Shirtless, laughing with the deliver men, he looks both entirely different than he does as a neatly-dressed secretary and intriguingly the same. Tobirama is going to be uncomfortably aware of just what is under Zabuza’s oxfords from now on, and he rather likes the idea.

It’s possible he’s been thinking about Izuna's words just a little too often this past week.

“I'm surprised the glass hasn’t cracked yet,” Izuna snickers, and waves a cheery hand at the figure coming up the stairs. “Hoshigaki, want to ogle with us?”

Kisame chuckles as he approaches, and Tobirama’s gaze instantly flickers to the dark-haired boy on his hip. “Maybe another time,” he says cheerfully.

“What’s ogle?” Haku asks curiously.

“Something you can't do until you're older,” Kisame tells him, then glances at Tobirama. “Director, I left my lab keys with Ameyuri if you need them. She’s waiting for the last results to come in, since I'm taking Haku home early.”

“We’re going to make fun of Shark Week,” Haku explains. “Mangetsu and Suigetsu are coming too. It’s a science sleepover weekend.”

“That sounds like an admirable way to spend a weekend,” Tobirama agrees seriously, and then looks back to Kisame. “I’ll make note. Have a good night.”

“It’ll be fun.” Kisame hoists Haku a little higher, glances down at where Zabuza is helping heave a crate onto a dolly, and then says, “I think your dad said he was just going to head back to the apartment tonight, right, Haku?”

“He said he was going to be boring,” Haku confirms, frowning like he greatly disapproves.

Kisame chuckles and smooths a hand over his hair. “Maybe someone will drag him out and make him have some fun,” he says, and grins at Tobirama. “It’d be good for him.”

“He needs to have more fun,” Haku agrees.

Izuna is snickering. Tobirama pointedly kicks him in the ankle and pushes away from the railing. “Perhaps I can help with that,” he tells Haku. “I hope you have a good evening.”

“You too,” Haku says graciously, and Tobirama smiles as he heads down the stairs, towards where Zabuza is just signing off on the delivery.

“Everything in order?” he asks as the delivery driver moves away.

Zabuza glances over, surprised, and then nods, holding the receipt out. “Looks like it,” he says. “New tanks for Kakashi and his eels. None of them looked cracked that I could see.”

“Good.” Tobirama pauses, considering Zabuza, and then says, “You're technically off the clock now?”

“Yeah, but I can clock back in if you need me for something.” Zabuza picks his shirt up, slinging it over his shoulder, and Tobirama has always enjoyed defined muscle on his men but Zabuza has even more than most. Between the muscle and the fact that he’s clearly an attentive father—well.

It’s very possible that Tobirama never stood much of a chance.

“Whatever your answer, there will be no effect on your employment here, or on our working relationship,” Tobirama says, meeting Zabuza’s gaze evenly, “but I was hoping you would be willing to join me for dinner tonight.”

Zabuza’s eyes widen, and he pauses like he’s waiting for the punchline. When Tobirama simply raises a brow at him, he huffs out a startled breath and asks, “ _Me_? You want to have dinner with your secretary?”

“I want to have dinner with an attractive man I would like to get to know better,” Tobirama says bluntly. “Whether it goes further than that is up to you.”

Zabuza stares at him for a long moment, then hooks a thumb over his shoulder, towards the labs. “You met Haku,” he says. “He doesn’t go away. Ever. He’s mine, and the two of us are a package deal.”

“I did meet Haku, and I like him,” Tobirama counters. “I am very fond of children, and I'm quite aware that you are a father.”

Another moment of silence, and then Zabuza laughs. “Hell,” he says, a little rough. “That’s the best response I've ever gotten to that. Yeah, I’ll do dinner.”

Something like victory but warmer, softer, curls in Tobirama’s chest. He reaches out, catching Zabuza’s elbow, and takes a step forward into his space. The way Zabuza’s eyes drift over his face to settle on his mouth is…gratifying. “I'm glad,” he says, and lets his fingertips drift over Zabuza’s forearm. “I have to close my office, but if you don’t object we can take my car.”

“No objection here,” Zabuza says, and he pulls his shirt on, buttons it but not all the way as he gives Tobirama a grin full of teeth. “I assume you don’t want me to change first?”

“I think I like you just as you are,” Tobirama says, and smirks when Zabuza’s breath catches.

Perhaps not _all_ of Izuna's ideas are entirely terrible, though Tobirama will certainly never say as much to his face.


End file.
